I spent all day in the library combing through the past 10 years worth of local phone books — including the Duke University Phone book! There is not a single listing for a Dr./Ms./Mr. Answer Person . Dr. Person, I contend you are a fraud! Reveal yourself or I shall be forced to ask tougher questions.
Signed,
Mr. Anon Ymous, Esq.
ANSWER PERSON RESPONDS: A fraud, you say! Have I ever pretended to be something other than what I am, a lonely fighter against the armies of ignorance, a savior to those struggling to find the . . . answer? Do you really need to know my address and phone number, when you already know how to reach me.
As with all super heroes, maintaining my physical anonymity, and an alternate “real world” identity, is vital to completing my mission. So I don’t put my picture or my mortal name on the web page or by the suggestion book, I don’t have a listing in phone books.
So accept my mystery for what it is, as I accept the fact that I can’t be recognized in my own time. Someday I may reveal myself: when the answers are all known, the suggestions all implemented, all those bizzare social problems have been solved, and there is adequate lighting in all the Duke libraries.