What is the what?
And who is who?
Category Archives: Just silly
Winners & losers
how do you win games that are rigged and cheat and that are impossible to win? i just want to be a game star.
A real winner doens’t play in those sorts of games.
Cat and mouse
If a cat eats a mouse and chokes on it and dies which one died first?
One or the other or a tie. Does it matter? The bottom line is the same. I suspect that the mouse died in the cat’s mouth, before getting stuck in it’s throat.
Underwear style
Boxers or Briefs? or boxer-briefs? or nothing at all? [3354C]
It’s certainly not nothing-at-all (is that a double negative?). AP has a policy of not publicizing style of undergarment, at least not until running for public office.
Nickname
Why did they call [Duke student] “the library” last semester? [3348A]
I hope you don’t have anything against libraries. It sounds a lot more distinguished than calling him “The Parking Deck” or “The Steam Plant.”
Armchair philosophy
When I do armchair philosophy, I like to refer to my partners in conversation by the Hispanicized versions of their first names (e.g. Kant – Manolo; Hegel – Jorge; Nietzche – Frederico; Wittgenstein – Rodrigo) but recently, I found a new conversant: SPINOZA. What name do I give him? [3340C]
Very cute. I hope that in your conversations with your pet dog he doesn’t command you to kill people. Spinoza apparently changed his name from the Hebrew Baruch to the Latin form, Benedictus. Both mean “blessed.” Sometimes you see his name in the English form, Benedict. The Spanish form is Benedicto.
Heffalumps
Can you please describe the feeding + mating patterns of a heffalump? [3340A]
Heffalumps exist in the world of Winnie the Pooh, so there simply isn’t any mating. They seem to eat honey. Just an aside: in Paul Theroux’s book Riding the Iron Rooster, he refers to Mao’s final senile period as his heffalump phase, either because Mao liked honey or more likely because the word conjures up images of a slow-moving, slow-thinking, pudgy, stooped-over elderly guy.
Pretty undies
What is the prettiest color of underwear? [3337C]
I suppose it depends on whom it’s for, but since variety is the spice of life maybe every day there’s a different prettiest color (or maybe you need a drawer full of multi-colored polka-dot pairs). Your pink ink may be a hint to AP; for the ladies, that’s a choice that certainly can’t lose, and for the guys, something to remember for a Valentine’s gift.
Meaningless
Please write something long, funny, and meaningles. [3336A]
Just start looking through this book from the beginning.