The questions we get in Perkins Research Services range from the fatuous to the far-fetched to the fascinating. This is one of a series on our most interesting research questions, and how we go about answering them. (Some details have been changed to protect our users’ privacy.) 

Anonymous IM makes it so easy to prank librarians that over the years we have finely tuned both our crap-detectors and our sense of humor. This month, for your entertainment, we bring you some of the silliest and least research-oriented questions we’ve gotten. We make no assertions about the users’ intentions.

look it upThe quick and frivolous

  • can I freeze rock buns?
  • my computer just got wiped
  • how old are you?
  • can u give me some help with my crush …. pllllllllllllllllllllzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz  :_(
  • PERKINS PERKINS COME IN PERKINS. STOP. THIS IS DUKE DIVINITY LIBRARY. STOP. WE ARE BUNKERED IN WITH MASSIVE SNOW. STOP.

Uh-oh
Sometimes our users do us a service by reporting problems in and around the libraries.

To whom it may concern: I wanted to inform you that on the second floor bridge, there is a HUGE ANT problem…I do not know why they are there, but I thought you may want to know!

[Did you know that our experts tell us the ants are seeking moisture, not your lunch? We are aware of the problem and doing our best to battle them on all fronts. To report a sighting, please fill out our building maintenance request form.]

FYI I think your current listing for: 20th century ghosts by Joe Hill is incorrect. It is currently: “There are many things that can go wrong with your car, but it’s knowing what to do that can make the difference between a small repair, a major bill, or worse.”

[We have reported this mismatched book summary to the vendor who provides them.]

Punked
We pride ourselves on providing answers or good referrals for all questions that come our way, however arcane. But we have not yet reached consensus on the answer to this ubiquitous question:

“What does the fox say?”

Post by Catherine Shreve, Librarian for Public Policy & Political Science

 

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